Two Cows Teach us About Politics

Over at the Pat Buchanan blog, they’ve posted a series of cow analogies for various political groups. I’m providing an exerpt, and the last one I threw in myself, because that’s the way lists like this should be. If you’ve got one, go ahead and put it in the comments.

DEMOCRAT	You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You feel guilty for being successful. You push for higher taxes so the government can provide cows for everyone.
REPUBLICAN	You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. So?
SOCIALIST	You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor. You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.
COMMUNIST	You have two cows. The government seizes both and provides you with milk. You wait in line for hours to get it. It is expensive and sour.
CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE Or the way it ought to be!	You have two cows. You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.
BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE	You have two cows. Under the new farm program the government pays you to shoot one, milk the other, and then pours the milk down the drain.
NEOCON	You have two cows. One of your neighbors wants to buy them for milking, the other for eating. You take bribes from both sides, promising to  favor them in your decision. Years later, they find themselves out a lot of money and holding nothing but bullshit.